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Guest OtterTeej

A Question For A More Experienced Therian Than I

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Guest OtterTeej   
Guest OtterTeej

I dunno if I'm the only Therian on here (I sincerely doubt it) but this is still a somewhat recent realization for me (about six months ago it finally hit me full-force). For the first three months or so after I figured it out, it was a big part of my thoughts. Most of my waking hours it was on my mind at varying levels. I tried to really understand what it meant to me. It turns out, a lot. It still does.

Anyway, here's my question: is being a Therian something that's supposed to be always in the back of your mind, or was that just me coming to terms with the realization and the initial child-like excitement of figuring it out? Seriously; I was like a kid with a new toy shoving it in everyone's face and talking about how cool it is. I still feel just as strongly about it, but...it doesn't permeate my every waking moment anymore. I'm well aware that for 23 years old, I act (and incidentally look) much younger, and I'm also far more naive than I rightfully "should" be, but this is really bugging me.

I've been pretty sheltered my whole life, so actually learning about myself is a very new concept that I've only started to embark upon in the last eight months or so. It's kind of surreal. In the span of two weeks, I figured out that I wasn't just a furry; I'm a therian and a lot of other things about me both good and bad. It's pretty cool to know this about myself, but...well, there's my question: is it supposed to be something that's always on my mind or was it just the initial excitement of learning something that deep (and awesome) about myself that had it constantly aboard my proverbial train of thought?

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Guest Macky   
Guest Macky

I find that when most people find something really cool to them or have an eyeopening moment about themselves they tend to make a big deal about it. I noticed very similar experiences with myself, my friends, even my parents and many, many other, older, and more experienced adults. I don't know if it's something that's always supposed to be on your mind, but the initial over-the-top excitement in finding something that relates to you happens with everyone. Even my most serious and level headed friends have at one point or another looked just a little more childish than normal when they found something of interest like you have. I think it has something to do with our inbred driving force for creativity and exploration, but I'm not an expert on that subject.

I'm not a Therian, but I've had many very similar eye-opening experiences just with other things that interested me. I unintentionally created my own little table top role playing games and miniature warfare games when I was really young (like 8). So then I go to college and "Hey! There's Warhammer 40k (A miniature war game)!" I spent $200 immediately on the game and couldn't stop babbling about it to friends who didn't really care until I found... "Hey! There's Dungeons and Dragons!" Again I did the same story that I did with the Warhammer stuff. But after a few months I got over the whole 'child with a new toy' phase. Now they are both just hobbies that I still enjoy playing a lot through my week and they make an important mark in my life and happiness.

The whole point I'm trying to make with that story is that eventually the shock and awe of learning more about who you are will eventually dwindle. You'll be able to do whatever you do normally and you won't feel the compulsion as strongly as you feel now to just tell the world your new found insight.

Just don't worry about it. It's just the initial excitement and your not the only person that has it in the world. (Actually I would think it to be weird if anyone didn't have it at least sometimes in their life... That would mean that they never gain any profound realizations or discover any interests in themselves. How boring. :P)

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Myuu   

Just remember that there will never be a "you," only a series of shifting psychological forces that make up your unique identity.

Components of your 'self' are constantly at odds and often contradict one another, if this gets out of hand, you have an identity crisis.

Whichever components make you Therian have probably been there since early on; consequently, if you begin to question them you will be digging under your foundations.

I suggest you integrate them as best you can into the character of the person you want to be, rather than try to isolate or compartmentalize them.

If you want to shake up your identity you should only do so with professional help, otherwise just refine the way your organize your thoughts as to avoid mental conflict.

If you are the type of person that categorizes and labels everything (like me), be sure that you do so in a detached and evenhanded manner.

I am as Therian as they come, and I would say that my identity is relatively unified and stable.

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Guest OtterTeej   
Guest OtterTeej

I do categorize and label a lot, actually. If you don't mind me asking, what sort of theiran are you?

I have, incidentally, been having a sort of identity crisis (though not so much a crisis as a long, hard look at myself) because the question of "who am I?" has never really been asked of me. By myself or anyone else. It's not even a question I avoided; it's just that cartoony excuse of "you didn't ask". And it's true! The question never entered my mind. When I realized how annoying/dull I was because I only discuss one topic, I realized I needed to dive into that question.

My roommate (now close friend) has helped me with this a lot, but I do take everything she says with a grain of salt because I've learned that the only one who really knows what's right for me is me. She is very insightful, sure, but even she says she won't hand me answers because she doesnt really know; only I do.

To be honest, the otter thing should have been blatantly obvious my whole life. The women of my moms family are all very spiritual (we're of Wastern European Jewish descent and there is DEFINITELY some Gypsy in there if you just look at my grandma or my mom) and have given me otter paraphanalia my whole life because I've always shown an interest in them. Then when I realized I was a furry, I wondered what my fursona should be, sat in my room, looked around and had a huge facepalm moment. Duh!

I've always felt some sort if spiritual connection to animals, but especially otters, and in that moment, that connection crystallized and I knew why I always felt so out-of-place. It wasn't necessarilly my Aspergers; it was because my whole being has always felt wrong! I was just too busy and jaded with life to pay attention. Being cut down, pushed around and bullied in more ways than one tends to draw your focus outward...

But I realized I've always had this nagging feeling about my body being somehow wrong, I've always loved swimming more than any human should (we had a pool in my backyard growing up that I would ask my parents to heat all year so I could still swim.) It's the only thing that literally makes my stress go away. Video games treat it, but swimming cures it.

So, in the last few days, my fragmented personality is starting to rejoin. I'm aware that I'm still a kid in my mind, but my body says otherwise. I'm aware that I feel like a girl even though reality says otherwise. I'm aware that I feel like an otter, but only my roommate, my aunt and my grandma can see me that way (I didn't even have to tell them). I can sense auras on some level, too; but my Aspergers affects my ability to empathize, so I can't sense them unless I really concentrate in a quiet, peaceful state. But I am aware of them like I'm aware of my own, so it's something else to work on. Overall, I'm putting myself back together and finding that each time I have to sit and do that, I become a better person.

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Myuu   

I am feline.

When I was very young, I had more cat friends than human friends.

That effected my development from early on.

Now, I can hardly sense myself any other way.

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Guest OtterTeej   
Guest OtterTeej

I didn't have many friends growing up, either. Mostly just the kids of my mom's friends who "had to be friends with me" because our moms were friends. We had little to nothing in common (save for one of them, but he was older than me and kind of treated me more like a tagalong little brother than a friend) and they didn't hang out with me at school (which I distinctly remember saying to my "friend" Michael "I don't blame you. I'm not cool, so they'll pick on you too". I made, like two friends and they were both social outcasts. That's all we had in common. That and they had a vague affection for gaming while I was learning about how games are made at age 7. I really didn't have any friends of my own until high school, and that was only because they were all in the same social skills class I was in (we all have varying degrees of Autism). Probably the only reason they tolerated me (and still do) is because we share the same core interest: video games. Well, and as it turns out one of them is also a furry, so that's kind of cool.

Also, I've always been super-talkative (it's something I'm working on, or at least on branching out my topics) and very positive despite all I went through. Having no friends in elementary and middle school means you're different, and being different means you're going to get bullied. A lot. So, yeah I developed a very strong sense of protection and justice. I never did take being made fun of well, and I always took it personally. Now, I can differentiate between malice and joking (I still have trouble differentiating tone, but I'm also working on that).

When I was a kid, my friends were basically Crash Bandicoot, Spyro the Dragon, Ratchet and Clank, Sonic the Hedgehog, (anyone seeing a pattern here?!) and my first ever game was Super Mario Bros. 3. Guess which power-up was my favorite? If you guessed Tanooki Suit, you're right. So, yeah...I...I was VERY clearly furry from a young age.

Did you ever get yelled at by teachers for not sitting up in your chair when it had a solid back? In retrospect, to this day it bugs me when the base of my...spine...is up against a solid chair back. Like, even before I started the hypnosis, I always had to sit in chairs "strangely" unless they had an open back. ^_^

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Guest Ahappypichu   
Guest Ahappypichu

Im not sure whether im an therian or not. Ever since I was 5 I wanted to be an wolf im not sure if its just an obsession or if its that im meant to be a wolf. All I know was that for me it didn't feel right bieng human. it wasn't till I was 8 when I started trying (and constantly failing) spells and other methods whether it be meditation or or paying witches to try to change me into an wolf. It wasnt until last year that I found out what an therian was. And I think (and hope) to be one. *and one side note never pay witches to put a spell or hex on you, even the ones that say they work.( I have been scamed of atleast 800 dollars) sorry for making this a long reply and getting off topic :-\

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Kanibal   

That's not a long reply.

It is a little off topic considering it's short length and it's also quite late. The discussion ended some months ago and that's quite a big topic bump. That is an offence, and you should know this from reading the FMA when you registered. 3 weeks and it's too old unless certain criteria are met by your post.

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Guest chromowolf   
Guest chromowolf

I may not do this right, but oh well. :P

It really depends on who you are. Are you excited by the idea of being a therian or is it just another thing in your life? The more you are inspired by it, the more it sticks with you. For instance, if you constantly think about it voluntarily or work in it, the more it will be stuck in your mind. The longer you leave it alone, the less of a distraction it is. With that said, I'd never let it sit idle for too long. According you you (yet again,) it can cause strange side effects. Not bad, but definitely what you wouldn't expect. Let an emotion bottle up, it'll burst soon and you will have no control of it. Same here. If you let it build up, it'll burst out one day unexpectedly and you'll have no control of it. You'll be more animal than you have been in a while. :P At least, that's what happens to me. :)

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Guest Felixthestoat   
Guest Felixthestoat

Yeah, sometimes I also worry that I might not be as excited about it as I once was, but I don't think it's anything to worry about really.... I just have an anxiety disorder.

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